Fic: What Might Have Been (3/?)
Dec. 2nd, 2006 10:06 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
serafina20Title What Might Have Been
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
serafina20
Rating: Mature
Pairing: Pam/Mahone/Michael (eventually)
Summary: How might things have gone if Pam and Alexander had never broken up?
Part 1
Part 2
"They framed my brother," Michael started once we were all sitting again. No food this time, no drinks. Not that I didn't still want to make sure my guest was comfortable, but now didn't seem the time. We'd stopped playing the strange and rather dangerous game we'd been and were now dumped straight into the lap of reality.
"Who framed your brother?" I asked. "Who is they?" My eyes slid to Alex, who was looking at Michael.
Michael shook his head. "I don't know who they are. Lincoln referred to them as the company once. No name. That's all I know. It has something to do with Caroline Reynolds. The president. They maneuvered her into the vice presidency, and now the presidency for some reason. By killing, bribes, underhanded deals, whatever. I can only assume that Steadman was standing in the way, so they got him out of the way and used Lincoln." He glanced at me, then back down at the table. "At first, he didn't even know who framed him. Just that he'd been set up from the beginning. He, uh. He has a past. But he's a good man," he added fervently. "My mom died when I was a kid, and he was there for me. Took care of me. When I was eighteen, he gave me ninety thousand dollars so I could go to college. He told me it was from our mother's insurance, but it wasn't. He borrowed it and was trying to pay it off." He looked up at Alex from under his eyelashes.
Alex gave Michael a crooked smile. "This isn't new information for me. Well. The reason for needing the money is new. The methods of paying it off? No."
"All illegal, I take it," I said.
Michael seemed to wilt. "Yeah. Stealing. Drugs. Violence. Whatever it took. But he never killed anyone. Except, this time he was told that he could erase the entire debt if he killed a drug dealer. He could justify it, you know? He had to get high, but he went to kill the guy and he was already dead. And definitely not Steadman."
"I thought they recently exhumed the body?" I asked.
"They must have faked the dental records somehow. They could do it." He sighed. "It seems like they can do anything. They almost transferred me out of prison. They killed LJ's mother and stepfather."
"LJ?"
"My nephew," he said, and his voice broke a little.
I reached out and took his hand. Squeezed it.
He breathed deeply, face twisted as if he were holding back tears. "He's just so young, you know? Fifteen years old. Father and uncle in jail and he... he's on the run because of something not even connected to him. Going to prison because my brother had the misfortune to be targeted by a conspiracy."
"I'm sorry, Michael," Alex said behind me, voice low.
"It's not your fault." Michael looked up at him, eyes full of pain. "You were doing your job. And trying to protect yourself."
"Not yet. They didn't contact me until a day or so later. A few hours before you staged your death."
Michael's smile was wry. "Better. I'd rather think you were just a good man who was pursuing justice than a man protecting your ass. Not that it was the best plan."
"For all the trouble, it was very well executed. It might have worked had I not heard the message."
There was this silence. Michael was looking at Alex, cheeks flushed. When I looked back at Alex, he was returning the look, face almost reverent. Both sets of blue eyes were hot.
I squirmed at the intensity, fire creeping through my veins.
"Why your brother?" I asked, because as interesting as what was going on between them was, I still wanted answers. "Why did they choose him?"
"Apparently my father used to work for the company. They chose my brother as some kind of revenge," Michael said, tearing his eyes from Alex. "I've never met my father. He took off when I was born. But Lincoln was being taken to talk to LJ, and there was an accident. He told me that someone from the company tried to kill him, but our father showed up. Saved him. Told him what was going on. I don't know where he is now."
"Why did he leave the company?" asked Alex.
Michael shrugged. "I don't know. Frankly, I don't really care. He's nothing to me, and I don't see why..." He broke off and shook his head. "Anyway. It seems like they have connections all over. Even in prison. Someone tried to kill my brother in there, before the execution. I think they even got to the governor. Sara Tancredi gave him the evidence showing how much doubt there was surrounding Lincoln's case, and he still refused to grant clemency. They want him dead. All of us. We know too much, and if we got what we know to the right people..." Michael trailed off. Laughed bitterly. "The irony? I don't care about the company. Or the conspiracy. All I want is for my family to be safe." His eyes were bright with a film of tears. "I wouldn't even tell anyone. I'm willing to leave the country and just... let them do whatever it is they want to do. But they just can't let us. They can't..." He stopped talking.
"Unfortunately, you're a threat. They don't know what you're going to do," Alex said. "Even if you told them you wouldn't do anything, they still coudn't be sure."
"I know." He wiped his eyes and took a deep breath. "How did they find out about Shales?"
I turned to Alex, curious as to the answer myself.
Alex shook his head. "I don't know. All I know is, they do know. They know I shot him. That I buried him in my back yard." He rubbed his eyes. "At first they just said they'd ruin my career unless I did a small favor for them. The favor isn't exactly what I would call small, but." He shrugged. "I love my job, Michael."
"I know."
"No, it... This is my life. It took me a long time to find something I could believe in, and now that I have, I didn't want to have to give it up. Not for someone who killed the president's brother.
"He didn't."
Alex shrugged. "I know that now. I didn't then. They never told me why they needed all of you dead, and I didn't ask." He swallowed, and looked at me. "Earlier today, I was on the phone with one of them. He made a vague illusion."
"He threatened to hurt her." Michel's hand tightened in mine.
"Not directly."
"They will. If you don't do what they want, they will hurt her. They'll kill her." He sniffed. "They've killed so many. They killed Veronica."
"Who's Veronica?" I turned back to him.
"The love of Lincoln's life. She was a lawyer. She was investigating for Lincoln, trying to prove his innocence. She... She found Steadman and called Lincoln. And they just killed her while she was on the phone with him. Just..." He broke off abruptly. Turned away, one hand over his mouth.
"Michael?" He was trembling.
He shook his head, eyes squeezed tightly. "I haven't let myself think about it," he said, voice low and rasping. "I can't..." Both hands came up to his head, practically clawing. "So many dead, and I can't..." He rose abruptly. "The bathroom?"
"Down the hall on the left."
Michael nodded and all but ran away.
I turned back to Alex. "Do you know anything about this conspiracy?" I asked, taking his hands in mine.
He shook his head. "Not really. I know some of the players, but they're very good at keeping themselves a secret. I've only spoken to two men. I do know they're powerful. I was supposed to head back to Chicago for an internal affairs investigation into the death of the fugitive I shot. The company called them and called off the investigation. I was at the airport when I received a call from Agent Sullins saying that friends in high places had saved me from a meeting with him, but he continued to find my highly edited file most interesting."
"So, they're FBI?"
"No, I don't think so. I think they have connections. If Michael is right, and the president is behind this, then I can't even begin to imagine the breadth of this conspiracy." He pulled me into his lap and hugged me. "I never wanted to put you in danger."
"I know." I kissed him. "I know, Alex." I kissed him again. "Why do you have to kill all the escapees?"
He shook his head. "I can only assume they're afraid Burrows and Michael told them about what's going on. And they want anyone dead who knows. That's why they didn't tell me."
"But now we know."
Alex nodded. Rested his forehead against mine. His hands went into my hair, combing down to the ends, then back up to thread into the base of my neck. "I don't know what to do. I can't kill him. I don't think I ever could, but I definitely can't now."
I put my hands on his face. "I know, baby."
"I'm not doing so well. I'm stressed."
"Well, of course."
"No, it's worse. The drugs aren't working. And the drugstore didn't have any in stock--which was ridiculous--and I had a very bad episode. Finally had to call that kid who used to deal to Shales to tide me over."
"But they're not working as well?"
He shook his head.
"I'll go back to the doctor. See if he can change the prescription. I'll go first thing in the morning."
It was an easy promise to make, but oh how I hated lying to get my husband the drugs he needed. We'd tried to get him off them, but he was just too full of anxiety. Unable to deal with it, and, it seemed, probably fighting a chemical imbalance anyway. He'd always been high strung, but after Shales, it got worse. He'd lash out at anyone and everything. Was almost unable to function. He'd finally sought out the drugs on his own, soon after our divorce went through. When we'd gotten back together, I'd been worried. What if they weren't good? What if someone tried to kill him, slipped him the wrong medication?
It'd been a long talk, a lot of arguing, but very soon after Alex and I had reconciled, I started being treated for depression. It was a struggle to get the right dosage, but we had found one that was working.
"I don't know," Alex said. "It doesn't seem to work. And I'm more worried about you right now."
"I can't start acting suspiciously," I pointed out. "I can't simply stay in the house. I'll go to the doctor, get a new prescription. Then we'll do whatever we're going to do."
"What are we going to do?"
I shrugged and sighed. "I don't know. Either find a way to bring down the conspiracy, or..."
"Or?"
"Or we cut and run." I pulled back. "I'm not giving up my life because of some government conspiracy. I am however willing to live my life in another country. So long as my husband is by my side."
"I don't know..."
"We can do it. You're the most important thing to me. Not the museum or the few friends I see on occasion. My parents are dead. Our child is gone. There's nothing to stop us from simply running away from the corruption." I rubbed his leg. "Except your job."
Alex sighed. Caressed the back of my hand. "The fact that these people can so easily disrupt the inner workings of the agency makes me sick. The fact the agency can be so easily infiltrated.... Who have I been working for?" He looked into my eyes. "It's always been you, Pam. My life is you. We're in this together."
I smiled, but sadly. Because what we were contemplating was terrifying. "I should see if Michael is all right. Unless you want to?"
He blushed faintly. "You see now. Why I've been acting like a lovesick teenager rather than a federal agent, I mean."
"I'm afraid I haven't been behaving very rationally myself," I admitted. "He's very...." I don't know what to say. Beautiful. Pure. Innocent. None of the words seemed right, although every one was true. "Unfinished," I finally said. "Smart and lovely. Lonely. Alone."
Alex nodded. "He is. And I know nothing about his brother, but I get the feeling that Michael will always be an afterthought. After his son. After that woman. He deserves to be first."
I stood up and dropped a kiss on Alex's head. "Get something for us to eat. I'll see if Michael's okay. Then we can all continue to scheme."
"I love you, Pam," Alexander said, taking me around the waist.
I kissed him again. Even after all these years, his kisses still make me dizzy and weak with need.
"I love you too, Alex. Always."
Author:
serafina20Rating: Mature
Pairing: Pam/Mahone/Michael (eventually)
Summary: How might things have gone if Pam and Alexander had never broken up?
Part 1
Part 2
"They framed my brother," Michael started once we were all sitting again. No food this time, no drinks. Not that I didn't still want to make sure my guest was comfortable, but now didn't seem the time. We'd stopped playing the strange and rather dangerous game we'd been and were now dumped straight into the lap of reality.
"Who framed your brother?" I asked. "Who is they?" My eyes slid to Alex, who was looking at Michael.
Michael shook his head. "I don't know who they are. Lincoln referred to them as the company once. No name. That's all I know. It has something to do with Caroline Reynolds. The president. They maneuvered her into the vice presidency, and now the presidency for some reason. By killing, bribes, underhanded deals, whatever. I can only assume that Steadman was standing in the way, so they got him out of the way and used Lincoln." He glanced at me, then back down at the table. "At first, he didn't even know who framed him. Just that he'd been set up from the beginning. He, uh. He has a past. But he's a good man," he added fervently. "My mom died when I was a kid, and he was there for me. Took care of me. When I was eighteen, he gave me ninety thousand dollars so I could go to college. He told me it was from our mother's insurance, but it wasn't. He borrowed it and was trying to pay it off." He looked up at Alex from under his eyelashes.
Alex gave Michael a crooked smile. "This isn't new information for me. Well. The reason for needing the money is new. The methods of paying it off? No."
"All illegal, I take it," I said.
Michael seemed to wilt. "Yeah. Stealing. Drugs. Violence. Whatever it took. But he never killed anyone. Except, this time he was told that he could erase the entire debt if he killed a drug dealer. He could justify it, you know? He had to get high, but he went to kill the guy and he was already dead. And definitely not Steadman."
"I thought they recently exhumed the body?" I asked.
"They must have faked the dental records somehow. They could do it." He sighed. "It seems like they can do anything. They almost transferred me out of prison. They killed LJ's mother and stepfather."
"LJ?"
"My nephew," he said, and his voice broke a little.
I reached out and took his hand. Squeezed it.
He breathed deeply, face twisted as if he were holding back tears. "He's just so young, you know? Fifteen years old. Father and uncle in jail and he... he's on the run because of something not even connected to him. Going to prison because my brother had the misfortune to be targeted by a conspiracy."
"I'm sorry, Michael," Alex said behind me, voice low.
"It's not your fault." Michael looked up at him, eyes full of pain. "You were doing your job. And trying to protect yourself."
"Not yet. They didn't contact me until a day or so later. A few hours before you staged your death."
Michael's smile was wry. "Better. I'd rather think you were just a good man who was pursuing justice than a man protecting your ass. Not that it was the best plan."
"For all the trouble, it was very well executed. It might have worked had I not heard the message."
There was this silence. Michael was looking at Alex, cheeks flushed. When I looked back at Alex, he was returning the look, face almost reverent. Both sets of blue eyes were hot.
I squirmed at the intensity, fire creeping through my veins.
"Why your brother?" I asked, because as interesting as what was going on between them was, I still wanted answers. "Why did they choose him?"
"Apparently my father used to work for the company. They chose my brother as some kind of revenge," Michael said, tearing his eyes from Alex. "I've never met my father. He took off when I was born. But Lincoln was being taken to talk to LJ, and there was an accident. He told me that someone from the company tried to kill him, but our father showed up. Saved him. Told him what was going on. I don't know where he is now."
"Why did he leave the company?" asked Alex.
Michael shrugged. "I don't know. Frankly, I don't really care. He's nothing to me, and I don't see why..." He broke off and shook his head. "Anyway. It seems like they have connections all over. Even in prison. Someone tried to kill my brother in there, before the execution. I think they even got to the governor. Sara Tancredi gave him the evidence showing how much doubt there was surrounding Lincoln's case, and he still refused to grant clemency. They want him dead. All of us. We know too much, and if we got what we know to the right people..." Michael trailed off. Laughed bitterly. "The irony? I don't care about the company. Or the conspiracy. All I want is for my family to be safe." His eyes were bright with a film of tears. "I wouldn't even tell anyone. I'm willing to leave the country and just... let them do whatever it is they want to do. But they just can't let us. They can't..." He stopped talking.
"Unfortunately, you're a threat. They don't know what you're going to do," Alex said. "Even if you told them you wouldn't do anything, they still coudn't be sure."
"I know." He wiped his eyes and took a deep breath. "How did they find out about Shales?"
I turned to Alex, curious as to the answer myself.
Alex shook his head. "I don't know. All I know is, they do know. They know I shot him. That I buried him in my back yard." He rubbed his eyes. "At first they just said they'd ruin my career unless I did a small favor for them. The favor isn't exactly what I would call small, but." He shrugged. "I love my job, Michael."
"I know."
"No, it... This is my life. It took me a long time to find something I could believe in, and now that I have, I didn't want to have to give it up. Not for someone who killed the president's brother.
"He didn't."
Alex shrugged. "I know that now. I didn't then. They never told me why they needed all of you dead, and I didn't ask." He swallowed, and looked at me. "Earlier today, I was on the phone with one of them. He made a vague illusion."
"He threatened to hurt her." Michel's hand tightened in mine.
"Not directly."
"They will. If you don't do what they want, they will hurt her. They'll kill her." He sniffed. "They've killed so many. They killed Veronica."
"Who's Veronica?" I turned back to him.
"The love of Lincoln's life. She was a lawyer. She was investigating for Lincoln, trying to prove his innocence. She... She found Steadman and called Lincoln. And they just killed her while she was on the phone with him. Just..." He broke off abruptly. Turned away, one hand over his mouth.
"Michael?" He was trembling.
He shook his head, eyes squeezed tightly. "I haven't let myself think about it," he said, voice low and rasping. "I can't..." Both hands came up to his head, practically clawing. "So many dead, and I can't..." He rose abruptly. "The bathroom?"
"Down the hall on the left."
Michael nodded and all but ran away.
I turned back to Alex. "Do you know anything about this conspiracy?" I asked, taking his hands in mine.
He shook his head. "Not really. I know some of the players, but they're very good at keeping themselves a secret. I've only spoken to two men. I do know they're powerful. I was supposed to head back to Chicago for an internal affairs investigation into the death of the fugitive I shot. The company called them and called off the investigation. I was at the airport when I received a call from Agent Sullins saying that friends in high places had saved me from a meeting with him, but he continued to find my highly edited file most interesting."
"So, they're FBI?"
"No, I don't think so. I think they have connections. If Michael is right, and the president is behind this, then I can't even begin to imagine the breadth of this conspiracy." He pulled me into his lap and hugged me. "I never wanted to put you in danger."
"I know." I kissed him. "I know, Alex." I kissed him again. "Why do you have to kill all the escapees?"
He shook his head. "I can only assume they're afraid Burrows and Michael told them about what's going on. And they want anyone dead who knows. That's why they didn't tell me."
"But now we know."
Alex nodded. Rested his forehead against mine. His hands went into my hair, combing down to the ends, then back up to thread into the base of my neck. "I don't know what to do. I can't kill him. I don't think I ever could, but I definitely can't now."
I put my hands on his face. "I know, baby."
"I'm not doing so well. I'm stressed."
"Well, of course."
"No, it's worse. The drugs aren't working. And the drugstore didn't have any in stock--which was ridiculous--and I had a very bad episode. Finally had to call that kid who used to deal to Shales to tide me over."
"But they're not working as well?"
He shook his head.
"I'll go back to the doctor. See if he can change the prescription. I'll go first thing in the morning."
It was an easy promise to make, but oh how I hated lying to get my husband the drugs he needed. We'd tried to get him off them, but he was just too full of anxiety. Unable to deal with it, and, it seemed, probably fighting a chemical imbalance anyway. He'd always been high strung, but after Shales, it got worse. He'd lash out at anyone and everything. Was almost unable to function. He'd finally sought out the drugs on his own, soon after our divorce went through. When we'd gotten back together, I'd been worried. What if they weren't good? What if someone tried to kill him, slipped him the wrong medication?
It'd been a long talk, a lot of arguing, but very soon after Alex and I had reconciled, I started being treated for depression. It was a struggle to get the right dosage, but we had found one that was working.
"I don't know," Alex said. "It doesn't seem to work. And I'm more worried about you right now."
"I can't start acting suspiciously," I pointed out. "I can't simply stay in the house. I'll go to the doctor, get a new prescription. Then we'll do whatever we're going to do."
"What are we going to do?"
I shrugged and sighed. "I don't know. Either find a way to bring down the conspiracy, or..."
"Or?"
"Or we cut and run." I pulled back. "I'm not giving up my life because of some government conspiracy. I am however willing to live my life in another country. So long as my husband is by my side."
"I don't know..."
"We can do it. You're the most important thing to me. Not the museum or the few friends I see on occasion. My parents are dead. Our child is gone. There's nothing to stop us from simply running away from the corruption." I rubbed his leg. "Except your job."
Alex sighed. Caressed the back of my hand. "The fact that these people can so easily disrupt the inner workings of the agency makes me sick. The fact the agency can be so easily infiltrated.... Who have I been working for?" He looked into my eyes. "It's always been you, Pam. My life is you. We're in this together."
I smiled, but sadly. Because what we were contemplating was terrifying. "I should see if Michael is all right. Unless you want to?"
He blushed faintly. "You see now. Why I've been acting like a lovesick teenager rather than a federal agent, I mean."
"I'm afraid I haven't been behaving very rationally myself," I admitted. "He's very...." I don't know what to say. Beautiful. Pure. Innocent. None of the words seemed right, although every one was true. "Unfinished," I finally said. "Smart and lovely. Lonely. Alone."
Alex nodded. "He is. And I know nothing about his brother, but I get the feeling that Michael will always be an afterthought. After his son. After that woman. He deserves to be first."
I stood up and dropped a kiss on Alex's head. "Get something for us to eat. I'll see if Michael's okay. Then we can all continue to scheme."
"I love you, Pam," Alexander said, taking me around the waist.
I kissed him again. Even after all these years, his kisses still make me dizzy and weak with need.
"I love you too, Alex. Always."
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2006-12-03 10:34 am (UTC)That line killed me. :)
no subject
Date: 2006-12-03 04:14 pm (UTC)I really love the backstory you've created for Alex and Pam and I love how ... on the same page they are, even when they're both confused about what's really going on.
Pam is just so smart, hot and tough and I love her here; I can see this character in the few minutes of the woman we've gotten on screen. And I llllove how intrigued she is by the chemistry between Alex and Michael. That's *incredibly* sexy.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-03 05:33 pm (UTC)Pam and Alex are going to take such good care of him.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-03 06:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-03 08:37 pm (UTC)I squirmed at the intensity, fire creeping through my veins."
The chemistry!!! It just crackles off the page! And I love how much it fascinates Pam.
"He blushed faintly. 'You see now. Why I've been acting like a lovesick teenager rather than a federal agent, I mean.'"
:) Oh Alex.
Brilliant as usual! I can't wait to see where you take this!